Ok. I know I'm probably going to catch some flak for watching "Twilight" but, honestly I must say It's really good, you guys.
First, I'm really confused as to why so many teenage girls like it. I mean Paul Newman was really a good lookin' fella in his prime, but by '98 he was maybe a little old for the tween set. The movie is basically about this aging private detective who ends up through an odd series of events including him getting shot in the thigh (remember this part its important later) living in the guest room of some retired movie producers or something played by Gene Hackman and Susan Sarandon.
After the very beginning, this part is kinda boring. I mean Gene Hackman and Paul Newman are great together, but they are just sitting around playing games and stuff. Then, like outta nowhere, Gene Hackman asks Paul Newman to deliver a mysterious package. When he gets there this guy gets MURDERD! Whaaaaat?!!!! I really wasn't expecting that. So the cops come and take paul newman to the police station where he sees his old friends stockard channing and James Garner who heard that he got shot at the beginning of the movie but they heard that he got shot in the ... ahem.... and not the thigh. This is actually a pretty funny joke in context.
I really don't want to spoil anything else for you, but suffice it to say he ends up on a pretty complex ride as the package is only the first key to a extraordinary mysterydventure. (Ya see what I did there?)
I must reiterate that I am kind of confused since this didn't seem like the type of movie that would be fodder for 7th grade girls, but I guess I'm just out of touch. Maybe we're moving back to a place where kids idolize real talent and wisdom instead of the fleeting joys of youth.
Showing posts with label vacation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label vacation. Show all posts
Monday, April 12, 2010
Sunday, March 21, 2010
@Frost/Nixon
Well I didn't like this movie at all. To begin with, the two main characters David Frost and Richard Noxin spoke in such a way that it was really hard for them to understand. Besides that, the movie is kind of unrealistic in that it implies that just because someone is super likable and suave, that he can beat an american president in a debate. I don't know about you, but I am getting pretty tired of this cool-guy-conquers-the-world template.
Frost looked like he hadn't worked a day in his life except to be funny and tell jokes and stuff on tv shows and then he was all hard on richard nixon. Plus the guy playing nixon didn't really look like the real nixon and used some salty language which I felt demeaned the office.
Also, why should a brittish guy who lives dewn-undah (~g'day mate!) give a crap about a fallen american prez? Who does he think he is trying to take down the guy who set up the first earth day in 1970?! I mean nixon worked his KEISTER off to get to where he was and then to have some petulant child tell him that he's a shyster? Really?
This movie left an extremely fowl taste in my mouth. I do not recommend anyone watch this movie whatsoever. To paraphrase some of the salty language fake nixon from the movie used, I hope the M***********s who made this movie CHOKE!
Also I think I'm going to start instituting a rating system to put numbers to how much I like movies. I'll call it the at system and it will range from zero to 5 ats (@). This movie gets a shocking zero ats.
Frost looked like he hadn't worked a day in his life except to be funny and tell jokes and stuff on tv shows and then he was all hard on richard nixon. Plus the guy playing nixon didn't really look like the real nixon and used some salty language which I felt demeaned the office.
Also, why should a brittish guy who lives dewn-undah (~g'day mate!) give a crap about a fallen american prez? Who does he think he is trying to take down the guy who set up the first earth day in 1970?! I mean nixon worked his KEISTER off to get to where he was and then to have some petulant child tell him that he's a shyster? Really?
This movie left an extremely fowl taste in my mouth. I do not recommend anyone watch this movie whatsoever. To paraphrase some of the salty language fake nixon from the movie used, I hope the M***********s who made this movie CHOKE!
Also I think I'm going to start instituting a rating system to put numbers to how much I like movies. I'll call it the at system and it will range from zero to 5 ats (@). This movie gets a shocking zero ats.
Monday, March 8, 2010
@JCVD
When I was younger, I used to love Jean-Claude Van Damme movies. What set his movies apart from Steven Segal or the Gov-ah-nator was that they had real heart. They always had amazing stories and you always left the theater feeling like you could take on the world.
In the past few years, however, I haven't been paying much attention to Van Damme because I tend not to pay much attention to movies that are released directly to video. For those of you who don't know, the reason movies get released only on video is because they are either A) not very good to begin with B) have too much sex for main stream movies or C) are really artsy-fartsy and don't have a chance to make any money.
JCVD, however does not fit any of these very well sometimes it's a little artsy-fatrsy), but I don't remember it ever coming out in theatres. This movie definitely shows me something. I am happy to say that Van Damme still has not only the karate moves, but the acting chops to really carry a movie.
You spend alot of this movie feeling bad for him. He really is just a victim of circumstance who has tried to attone for his past sins by just being a good guy and trying to get stuff going again. There are lots of funny jokes in this movie, including jokes about steven segal cutting off his pony tail and about how Van Dammes daughter is ashamed of him. That last one extempified the level of black humor that abounds in this film; you often find yourself laughing at Vandammes Expense but then feeling really bad for it.
Like I said, there are several parts that were a little to much for me, like when Van Damme has a look at the camera and pretty much begs americans to like him. You don't have to beg Jean-Claude! I like you very much!
In the past few years, however, I haven't been paying much attention to Van Damme because I tend not to pay much attention to movies that are released directly to video. For those of you who don't know, the reason movies get released only on video is because they are either A) not very good to begin with B) have too much sex for main stream movies or C) are really artsy-fartsy and don't have a chance to make any money.
JCVD, however does not fit any of these very well sometimes it's a little artsy-fatrsy), but I don't remember it ever coming out in theatres. This movie definitely shows me something. I am happy to say that Van Damme still has not only the karate moves, but the acting chops to really carry a movie.
You spend alot of this movie feeling bad for him. He really is just a victim of circumstance who has tried to attone for his past sins by just being a good guy and trying to get stuff going again. There are lots of funny jokes in this movie, including jokes about steven segal cutting off his pony tail and about how Van Dammes daughter is ashamed of him. That last one extempified the level of black humor that abounds in this film; you often find yourself laughing at Vandammes Expense but then feeling really bad for it.
Like I said, there are several parts that were a little to much for me, like when Van Damme has a look at the camera and pretty much begs americans to like him. You don't have to beg Jean-Claude! I like you very much!
Monday, January 4, 2010
@ 2009
So it may be a few days late but 2009 was such a great year for movies that I just couldn't decide on my 10 faves. I will try to review them in what I believe to be the order they were released so as not to hurt any feelings.
Paul Blart Mall Cop
I always enjoy trying to spot product placements in movies and this movie had it all. It is set in a shopping mall environment and features real live stores! It was an ingenious place to set a movie that you intend to put lots of product placements in because the setting makes the placements much less obvious. Kudos to the director for thinking of that. There was a scene in a victorias secret as well which any red blooded american male will like. The main character is obviously a mall cop who is set up to be an underdog. Without giving anything away, he certainly overcomes some tremendous odds. There are plenty of humorous pratfalls and silliness to delight the kid in each and everyone of us.
Push
This sci fi thriller features about psycic teens has lots of cool special effects and even some neat fight scenes. I thought the premise, that the government was trying to use a drug to create an army of supersoldiers was really novel, and that the choice to make the superheroes all teenagers made it even more tense. I didn't expect much out of this move but I was blown away by how powerful the story was. It is a little scary at some times because there are points when you don't know if some of the characters will make it or not and far be it from me to spoil any of these exciting plot points for you. I just think it is an important story to tell and that there are many parallels between the movie and what is going on in the world today. Very timely and very good.
Prescious
This is a powerful, painful account of an ugly girl's struggle to make something of her self. Honestly, after I walked out of this movie I was a completely changed person. I thought to my self that if she can do so much with so little that I can do a ton with what G-d has granted me.
I really didn't expect to see so many actual real life musicians lending their acting talents to such an unknown and un anticipated story, but I am so glad they did. It also proved to me that Mariah Carey not only has great singing chops, but acting chops as well. I am not ashamed to say that I bawled like a baby after I got home and started thinking about how much this movie has and will do for me.
Obsessed
WOW. I love Beyonce Noles. Not only is she really pretty, but you can tell from her acting in this movie that she will make a really good mother to her baby. She cares so much, that it's hard to imagine that there is not something behind it all. Her husband was played by the guy who took over the office in the office when Michael left to start his own company and, though I didn't like him very much on the show, he was really good in this movie. Like Push, it has a really original story that will keep you guessing at every twist and turn of the quite circuitous plot.
Year 1
I have heard some people say that this movie was stupid because people didn't speak english back in prehistoric times. But honestly I think this is just one of the things that makes this movie really really funny and absurd. Jack Black plays a hunter and this weenie little kid plays a gatherer and they go around starting their own tribe after one of them eats from the tree of knowledge. Then they have to go save these pretty ladies they liked from their old tribe after they are kidnapped and sold into slavery. I know this doesn't sound really all that funny the way I am describing it but there is clearly a lot of chemistry between black and the weenie kid. There are lots of fun slapstick jokes and even more touching moments later on in the movie to give it the perfect mix of laughter and heart.
The Ugly Truth
The poster tells you everything you need to know. Gerard butler is holding the heart over his eh-hem and Izzy from Greys Anatomy is holding it near her head. This really is a clever metaphor for how these two mis-matched matches interact with each other...to hilarious results!!! Gerard has a talk show and Izzy is a morning show anchor who is all upset about having crappy dates. Thus when she sees the show one night she calls and argues with him about his cynical perspective on women. When Izzy finds out that her show has bad ratings the bosses bring on Gerard as a counterpoint. At first they don't like each other at all but in the end they realize that it is our differences that bring us closer! The ugly truth is that this is a great, hilarious romantic comedy.
District 9
Wow. There are a ton of really great special effects in this movie. The aliens were pretty creepy at first, but when you find out that they are actually pretty friendly if you treat them OK, the movie becomes a whole lot more enjoyable. The best part about this is that the main guy, named Wickus (such a cool name), slowly is turning into one of the aliens (they call them prongs or something in the movie). This makes him (and the audience) very sympathetic to the cause of the aliens. It has an extremely bittersweet ending, but all in all I would say this is a beautiful movie. However, I must warn that it does have a lot of violence. I know some of my readers aren't huge violence fans and they may want to skip this one, but I promise it's worth it.
All about Steve
I just love sandra bullock and she is in top form in this laff-fest. She plays a crossword puzzle writer who is really book smart but not smart socially. This makes her dating life kind of hard until she meets Bradley cooper on a blind date. They are so funny together and have even more chemistry that Butler and Izzy had in The Ugly Truth. She is totally obsessed with him and in the end learns that she doesn't need to change to fit society because there are lots of crazy socially inept people who will be your friend just the way you are. What a great message!
The Informant?
I thought this movie would be a comedy, but infact it was actually a pretty serious drama about someone with manic depression. It's about what happens when someone tries to do a good deed (even if it was prompted by his wife) and be a decent person but gets taken advantage of. Matt Damon gives a Tour de force performance as out of control informant Mark Whitacre and Scott Bakula is stellar as the FBI agent who gets caught up in the crap sandwich caused by Matt Damon's character's inability to deal with pressure. This is a disturbing and poigniant portrait of mental illness.
Avatar
You know why. See the review @avatar above.
Paul Blart Mall Cop
I always enjoy trying to spot product placements in movies and this movie had it all. It is set in a shopping mall environment and features real live stores! It was an ingenious place to set a movie that you intend to put lots of product placements in because the setting makes the placements much less obvious. Kudos to the director for thinking of that. There was a scene in a victorias secret as well which any red blooded american male will like. The main character is obviously a mall cop who is set up to be an underdog. Without giving anything away, he certainly overcomes some tremendous odds. There are plenty of humorous pratfalls and silliness to delight the kid in each and everyone of us.
Push
This sci fi thriller features about psycic teens has lots of cool special effects and even some neat fight scenes. I thought the premise, that the government was trying to use a drug to create an army of supersoldiers was really novel, and that the choice to make the superheroes all teenagers made it even more tense. I didn't expect much out of this move but I was blown away by how powerful the story was. It is a little scary at some times because there are points when you don't know if some of the characters will make it or not and far be it from me to spoil any of these exciting plot points for you. I just think it is an important story to tell and that there are many parallels between the movie and what is going on in the world today. Very timely and very good.
Prescious
This is a powerful, painful account of an ugly girl's struggle to make something of her self. Honestly, after I walked out of this movie I was a completely changed person. I thought to my self that if she can do so much with so little that I can do a ton with what G-d has granted me.
I really didn't expect to see so many actual real life musicians lending their acting talents to such an unknown and un anticipated story, but I am so glad they did. It also proved to me that Mariah Carey not only has great singing chops, but acting chops as well. I am not ashamed to say that I bawled like a baby after I got home and started thinking about how much this movie has and will do for me.
Obsessed
WOW. I love Beyonce Noles. Not only is she really pretty, but you can tell from her acting in this movie that she will make a really good mother to her baby. She cares so much, that it's hard to imagine that there is not something behind it all. Her husband was played by the guy who took over the office in the office when Michael left to start his own company and, though I didn't like him very much on the show, he was really good in this movie. Like Push, it has a really original story that will keep you guessing at every twist and turn of the quite circuitous plot.
Year 1
I have heard some people say that this movie was stupid because people didn't speak english back in prehistoric times. But honestly I think this is just one of the things that makes this movie really really funny and absurd. Jack Black plays a hunter and this weenie little kid plays a gatherer and they go around starting their own tribe after one of them eats from the tree of knowledge. Then they have to go save these pretty ladies they liked from their old tribe after they are kidnapped and sold into slavery. I know this doesn't sound really all that funny the way I am describing it but there is clearly a lot of chemistry between black and the weenie kid. There are lots of fun slapstick jokes and even more touching moments later on in the movie to give it the perfect mix of laughter and heart.
The Ugly Truth
The poster tells you everything you need to know. Gerard butler is holding the heart over his eh-hem and Izzy from Greys Anatomy is holding it near her head. This really is a clever metaphor for how these two mis-matched matches interact with each other...to hilarious results!!! Gerard has a talk show and Izzy is a morning show anchor who is all upset about having crappy dates. Thus when she sees the show one night she calls and argues with him about his cynical perspective on women. When Izzy finds out that her show has bad ratings the bosses bring on Gerard as a counterpoint. At first they don't like each other at all but in the end they realize that it is our differences that bring us closer! The ugly truth is that this is a great, hilarious romantic comedy.
District 9
Wow. There are a ton of really great special effects in this movie. The aliens were pretty creepy at first, but when you find out that they are actually pretty friendly if you treat them OK, the movie becomes a whole lot more enjoyable. The best part about this is that the main guy, named Wickus (such a cool name), slowly is turning into one of the aliens (they call them prongs or something in the movie). This makes him (and the audience) very sympathetic to the cause of the aliens. It has an extremely bittersweet ending, but all in all I would say this is a beautiful movie. However, I must warn that it does have a lot of violence. I know some of my readers aren't huge violence fans and they may want to skip this one, but I promise it's worth it.
All about Steve
I just love sandra bullock and she is in top form in this laff-fest. She plays a crossword puzzle writer who is really book smart but not smart socially. This makes her dating life kind of hard until she meets Bradley cooper on a blind date. They are so funny together and have even more chemistry that Butler and Izzy had in The Ugly Truth. She is totally obsessed with him and in the end learns that she doesn't need to change to fit society because there are lots of crazy socially inept people who will be your friend just the way you are. What a great message!
The Informant?
I thought this movie would be a comedy, but infact it was actually a pretty serious drama about someone with manic depression. It's about what happens when someone tries to do a good deed (even if it was prompted by his wife) and be a decent person but gets taken advantage of. Matt Damon gives a Tour de force performance as out of control informant Mark Whitacre and Scott Bakula is stellar as the FBI agent who gets caught up in the crap sandwich caused by Matt Damon's character's inability to deal with pressure. This is a disturbing and poigniant portrait of mental illness.
Avatar
You know why. See the review @avatar above.
Monday, December 28, 2009
@ Sherlock Homes
To begin with, wow and not in a good way.
I have always been a huge fan of the sherlock homes shows they show on TV so please don't try to say that I just don't like this type of movie because I really enjoy mysteries. I even enjoy macabre things from time to time but this was a little much. Don't laugh but it was a little too scary at points to be a good movie. I mean the hound of the baskervilles is pretty scary stuff, but usually they show that around Halloween so you're kind of prepared.
For example, it starts off with something macabre. There is waht looks like a satanic sacrifice. Yes you heard me right. A SATANIC SACRIFICE. Theres that circle and star thing and then knives and some sort of mind control going on. I am not making this up. Then Sherlock Homes and mr. watson come in and stop it which is good, but its a little too close for comfort as a pretty girl almost gets stabbed to death in the name of the Devil!
Then Watson is moving out of the townhouse that they share which is sad, but it's kind of happy too because he's going to get married.
Another thing I didn't like about this movie is how they made it all like homes was really goofy and couldn't take care of himself except for when he was fighting which he did very well might I add. That was weird. He was really good at beating people up. So much so that he did it for money in his off time. But watson was really good at fighting too and really strong with is weird.
Anyway, after they go and save the girl at the beginning the evil guy gets hung and comes back to life! I won't spoil anything for you but I have to hand it to the director that this was a really clever Idea. Just too bad there had to be so much bad stuff along the way. There were explosions too, which was weird becuase horror movies usually don't have stuff blowing up in them.
I'm just getting angry and upset writing this because I am so disappointed so I'm just going to put a list of things that should have been in the movie but werent:
The normal Sherlock Homes Hat
The phrase "Elementary my dear Watson"
A cheeky nod to Hercule Poirot
The normal sherlock homes pipe. He smokes this stupid modern looking pipe the whole time and it looks stupid.
A big magnifying glass.
Something that let you know that the scary stuff wasn't for real.
There are probably more things, and maybe I'll post some later if I think of them but for now, just take my advice and don't see this unless you are some sort of sicko.
I have always been a huge fan of the sherlock homes shows they show on TV so please don't try to say that I just don't like this type of movie because I really enjoy mysteries. I even enjoy macabre things from time to time but this was a little much. Don't laugh but it was a little too scary at points to be a good movie. I mean the hound of the baskervilles is pretty scary stuff, but usually they show that around Halloween so you're kind of prepared.
For example, it starts off with something macabre. There is waht looks like a satanic sacrifice. Yes you heard me right. A SATANIC SACRIFICE. Theres that circle and star thing and then knives and some sort of mind control going on. I am not making this up. Then Sherlock Homes and mr. watson come in and stop it which is good, but its a little too close for comfort as a pretty girl almost gets stabbed to death in the name of the Devil!
Then Watson is moving out of the townhouse that they share which is sad, but it's kind of happy too because he's going to get married.
Another thing I didn't like about this movie is how they made it all like homes was really goofy and couldn't take care of himself except for when he was fighting which he did very well might I add. That was weird. He was really good at beating people up. So much so that he did it for money in his off time. But watson was really good at fighting too and really strong with is weird.
Anyway, after they go and save the girl at the beginning the evil guy gets hung and comes back to life! I won't spoil anything for you but I have to hand it to the director that this was a really clever Idea. Just too bad there had to be so much bad stuff along the way. There were explosions too, which was weird becuase horror movies usually don't have stuff blowing up in them.
I'm just getting angry and upset writing this because I am so disappointed so I'm just going to put a list of things that should have been in the movie but werent:
The normal Sherlock Homes Hat
The phrase "Elementary my dear Watson"
A cheeky nod to Hercule Poirot
The normal sherlock homes pipe. He smokes this stupid modern looking pipe the whole time and it looks stupid.
A big magnifying glass.
Something that let you know that the scary stuff wasn't for real.
There are probably more things, and maybe I'll post some later if I think of them but for now, just take my advice and don't see this unless you are some sort of sicko.
Monday, December 21, 2009
@Avatar: More than just pure popcorn fun at the movies
I was apprehensive. I didn't really like the prospect of sitting in the same place for 3 hours with nothing to show for it but a headache and an upset stomach from the popcorn. However, though I left the theater with both of those things (for different reasons, though... don't ask) Avatar gave me an extra parting gift... the "Star Wars 1" Experience. I've always heard that audiences leaving "Star Wars 1" in 197? believed they had seen something special... something game changing. Who knows if they were right, but what I can say for sure is that Avatar is the real deal.
I had been told that Avatar was just "Dances with Wolves...in space" or at least that the plot was somewhat derivative. Who knows, but what I will say is that I found myself wishing I had an avatar and that I could run really fast and be in tune with nature on that level. At first, the Na'vi seem really woo woo and flakey, but the more you learn about their ways, the more you understand that they may be in fact wiser than we (and also several characters in the movie itself) give them credit for. The audience I saw the movie with was really sad to leave the theater and I can only imagine that when they went home, they did so with an increased appreciation of life. I certainly did.
Of course, there are going to be detractors who say that this is nothing more than the most amazing 3 hours of visual art you have ever seen. DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES LISTEN TO THESE PEOPLES. It is so much more than that. I have never seen Titanic, but if it evokes even 1/4th of the emotion that this movie does, it must be incredible. You are intended to fall in love with the planet and the Na'vi and you do. You want those in-laws. You want those friends and that wife. You want to have a direct line to every member of your species who has died.
Sure it costs 10 bucks (well a matinee here in NC costs ten beans) even if you protest that you already have Real-D glasses that you borrowed from your friend. I would gladly pay an additional 10 simoleons and 3+ hours (with trailers) to see it again.
Anyway, getting back to my point, I now know how it must have felt to see "Star Wars 1" in the theater. Maybe I should go rent it...
I had been told that Avatar was just "Dances with Wolves...in space" or at least that the plot was somewhat derivative. Who knows, but what I will say is that I found myself wishing I had an avatar and that I could run really fast and be in tune with nature on that level. At first, the Na'vi seem really woo woo and flakey, but the more you learn about their ways, the more you understand that they may be in fact wiser than we (and also several characters in the movie itself) give them credit for. The audience I saw the movie with was really sad to leave the theater and I can only imagine that when they went home, they did so with an increased appreciation of life. I certainly did.
Of course, there are going to be detractors who say that this is nothing more than the most amazing 3 hours of visual art you have ever seen. DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES LISTEN TO THESE PEOPLES. It is so much more than that. I have never seen Titanic, but if it evokes even 1/4th of the emotion that this movie does, it must be incredible. You are intended to fall in love with the planet and the Na'vi and you do. You want those in-laws. You want those friends and that wife. You want to have a direct line to every member of your species who has died.
Sure it costs 10 bucks (well a matinee here in NC costs ten beans) even if you protest that you already have Real-D glasses that you borrowed from your friend. I would gladly pay an additional 10 simoleons and 3+ hours (with trailers) to see it again.
Anyway, getting back to my point, I now know how it must have felt to see "Star Wars 1" in the theater. Maybe I should go rent it...
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